The Cock Column - "Shower Erections"

Received by email:

"I'm straight, 27, and I'm engaged to be married.
I've never messed around with another guy before, but I did wank with a mate a few times when I was in my teens. Nothing mutual, just in the same room while we watched porn. I didn't even pay attention to his dick.


Life was great until about three months ago. I work for a Gym and started in admin part-time. It was a great opportunity because I was a member there anyway. I work out about three times a week so it seemed perfect to take the job when it was offered. But three months ago one of the Gym guys left and I was asked to fill in because I know the place well and have done a little mentoring before.


It was another great opportunity, it meant a pay rise, more hours and getting to work out during the day while helping other guys meet their goals too.


I've become really good mates with a guy I work with, Steve. We knew each other anyway of course, but since working on the floor we've become really good mates and we go out for a drink every week and he comes over now and then too.
He has a really hot Girlfriend who gets on really well with my fiance.
Every day at work he's responsible for locking up, and we usually have a good workout when the place is empty. Then we go and have a shower before leaving.


Like I say, I'm engaged and I've never done anything with another guy, but I really look forward to that shower at the end of the shift. I've never really had an interest in cock, other than occasionally enjoying it in straight porn. But Steve is really hung and I can't help staring!
As soon as we get into the locker room and he's stripping off I find myself watching him and literally gawking at his dick. It's not a foot long or anything, I'd guess about 8 inches. He's uncut like me, and while my dick is darker and the skin rougher, his is really pale and totally smooth, It's actually really nice to look at. He has really low balls too, and he shaves them (I've seen him do it!)


Every time we have a shower I feel myself getting hard and stealing glimpses of his dick while we're talking, and I have to face away from him most of the time and think of nasty shit to keep my dick down.
The main thing is that I've seen him get semi-hard almost every time too. I've caught him looking at my dick a few times.
I'm totally confused about what this means. And I don't know what I should do."


I say it quite often, labels are not what they're cracked up to be. Human sexuality is nowhere hear as simple as the three labels.

Guys often get semi-hard in showers and locker rooms, especially after a workout. Even the straightest men get it now and then and it can have little to do with being around other cock. It's probably more to do with the physical exertion and being in the prime physical condition to breed. But, it's also very true that MOST MEN regardless of sexuality, check out other cock when they have the chance. It's a fetish thing, or a comparison thing, or maybe just a taboo thing. Whatever the reason, blokes often look at cock when they strip around each other.

I think the fact that you describe his dick in the way you have shows that your interest is more than just comparison and your arousal more than just physical exertion. You don't say what you'd like from this friendship, but as you've explained that you used to wank with a friend as a teenager, I'd suggest you've let slip that this is something you'd be interested in with him.

It all depends what you want.
If you want to see his dick up-close, want to wank with him, see him cum, or even stroke it for him, all of this is possible with the right attitude and slow progress.
You're already over the first hurdle; you are comfortable being naked (and semi-hard) around each other.
If you want to move this on, I'd suggest that a great way to do it would be to use porn as an entry into some sexual sharing. The next time you're alone at work and about to have your workout, sneak off and place a porn mag on the locker room floor, somewhere not in plain view but somewhere he'll notice, as though a guy has dropped it from his bag. If you're really worried about it being too obvious, buy a cheap bag and fill it with random stuff including a porn mag or two, and leave that in the locker room for your mate to find. He'll think some guy has just forgotten it, and you'll look inside to find a porn mag.

I highly doubt any red-blooded guy would pass up the chance to have a wanking session over some "discovered" porn. The fact that you're so comfortable around each other already is a good sign, and I fully expect that once he's found that porn, he'll be hard and stroking in seconds, and you'll join him.

If you're not hoping to have a wanking buddy friendship with him, there's not much else you can do that you're not already doing. If you're worried about getting hard in front of him in the shower, either try to overcome it the way you have been or simply avoid the showers. If you do, you may find you lose a friend as he'll probably take this sudden distance personally.

There's nothing to be confused about. Just know that the labels are wrong. You can be heterosexual in every other respect and have a fascination for cock. You can have a wife/girlfriend and still have wanking sessions with other guys just for fun, as a bonding thing, competition or just a laugh. It doesn't change who you are, and it certainly doesn't make you any different from the majority of men, only you are willing to abandon the false labels in order to enjoy life as much as possible.

Let me know how this goes!

If you would like advice or you have an issue to explore please email me at luke@b8m8network.com


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Uncut is better because...

I often see the same debate going on in adult forums about what people prefer when it comes to circumcision.
My thoughts on enforced genital mutilation are known, so I'll avoid going into that discussion again here, and instead I'll focus on why intact cock is always better!

I've seen both sides of the argument vehemently defending their position. It can be funny, and it can sometimes be quite disturbing, with some people simply unaware of what circumcision is and why it is practiced (in fact, most Americans don't really know why this still goes on).

I'll explain just some of the reasons why I love Uncut dick...

1. More to play with

Uncut men have more skin to play with. It stretches, and can make for some very interesting play.

It feels great to have a finger under there, lubed up and exploring around the helmet. And it doesn't have to be your finger of course.

2. Foreskin Docking

Whether your wank buddy is cut or uncut, you can have a great deal of fun sharing your foreskin by "docking" - rolling one foreskin over the hard helmet of another guys dick.

Again, this feels great as your wet helmets slip and slide together under that skin.

3. Variation

Every foreskin is different. While most cut cock is neat and you still have a lot of cock to admire, there's a little less there to make a cock a one-of-a-kind.

Some are long, some are loose, some are tight, some are smooth and some are very wrinkly. And I love them all.

4. Lubrication

Uncut dick has another benefit; being able to retain pre-cum when having sex or wanking.

As the dick creates pre-cum the hood becomes lubricated and keeps it where it's needed, around the head of your cock. This makes wanking more pleasurable, and cheaper because you don't need to buy so much lube.


There are more reasons. And I may edit this again to add them. But you have an idea of just why uncut cock is so much better.

The Masturbation Fetish

Conran Thomas, A very good friend of mine (and a wanking buddy) recently finished a book all about masturbation and the fetish men have for it, regardless of their sexuality.

He took a lot of time exploring and researching exactly what men think about sharing masturbation with other men.

There is no doubt that he believes most men have a love for masturbation that goes far beyond enjoying the act itself. Throughout the book he provides evidence to show that many men who state themselves to be entirely heterosexual also enjoy seeing other men naked and masturbating.

They don't really have an explanation for this when it comes to their sexuality, they're stuck in the idea that the three labels are absolute and that everything they enjoy sexually must rigidly adhere to a few stereotypical preferences.

We all have fetishes. The most common recognized (and socially discussed) fetishes when it comes to men are for big boobs and large buttocks. But there's the unspoken fetishes too, such as for facial cum-shots, threesomes and orgies. These are probably just as prevalent, but they are rarely recognized in polite conversation as an acceptable sexual desire. And rightly so.

Still, the fact that it isn't something people discuss generally like big boobs and bums, these desires are still up there with the most open of them,

Another fetish that men do not discuss, and probably even more seldom than threesomes and facial cumshots, is masturbation.

There are very few aspects of porn that appear in almost every single popular adult title available on the open market. Popular titles include scenes of muscular men having sex with women, but they also include scenes of lesbian sex and threesomes. But one aspect that is included in almost EVERY SINGLE porn movie is the male (or males) masturbating to ejaculation.

Regardless of where the cum flies or lands, who they're with, or what sexual acts have gone before, almost every scene in every porn movie ends with the male star (or stars) furiously stroking their cock and shooting their load.

The camera focuses on them, the male, completing this event with the eruption of their cum.

If you have ever watched porn and wanked with another guy, and if that guy was straight, you'll have seen that this is usually the point at which they cum too.

When I was a teen and I began watching porn with a straight friend of mine, I found it interesting that he would rewind a scene, or skip forward, to cum when the male star did. He would time it pretty closely.

Hence, I truly believe that my friends Conran has it right. No matter your sexual lifestyle, no matter who you choose to sleep with, the vast majority of men have a fetish for male masturbation and ejaculation. We love to do it, we love to see it, we don't care who is attached to that dick, we just love to see a guy enjoying his cock and getting off.

Being able to do this in the company of other men is not possible for most. While they may even recognize that they love to see a cock being stroked and a load shooting out, they rarely get to the point of understanding how this can be enjoyed in reality without it meaning they must be bisexual or gay.

So, regardless of this widespread fetish, most are restricted by the labels and will never experience the bonding and close friendship that comes from sharing this hobby.

Thankfully, I'm not so restricted by the labels. I really don't care what people think it makes me. 

Life is too short.